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SSBBW / FA Quote of the Moment

"God gave me the desire for the voluptuous size. I canít argue with God, because He is all wise. Big girls are so special, appealing and unique. They take my breath away, I can hardly speak." ~ Phil Moore [FA - Poet]



THE FUNNY BONE

Tasteful jokes and comics

Know a good tasteful joke? Seen a funny cartoon/comic by or about SSBBW/BBW that made you laugh? Let us know at info@ssbbw-magazine.com.


Unique and Fun April Fool's Pranks

Toilet Trouble

Put a piece of bubblewrap under the toilet seat so when your victim sits, they are surprised by a loud POP!

You Spilled What

Find an old bottle of nail polish that you don't want anymore. Unscrew the cap and set it sideways on a piece of waxed paper, letting the contents flow out into a puddle. When it dries completely, peel it off of the paper. Now you can put it anywhere and trick someone into thinking there is spilled nail polish. Works best on something your victim cherishes or on one of their important documents!

Forgetful

Tape magnets to the bottom of an empty coffee cup, and attach it to the top of your car. Laugh at all the people who frantically try to get your attention as you drive by.


The Rules of Chocolate

If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.

Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

The problem: How to get two pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car.
The solution: Eat it in the parking lot.

Diet tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal.
It'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.

A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Isn't that handy?

If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, what's wrong with you?

If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

Money talks. Chocolate sings.

Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

Why is there no such organization as Chocoholics Anonymous?
Because no one wants to quit.

Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

Chocolate is a health food. Chocolate is derived from cacao beans. Bean = vegetable. Sugar is derived either from sugar beets or cane, both vegetables. And, of course, the milk/cream is dairy. So eat more chocolate to meet the dietary requirements for daily vegetable and dairy intake.



"Spring shows what God can do with a drab and dirty world."
~Virgil A. Kraft
"April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four."
~Mark Twain

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