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SSBBW / FA Quote of the Moment

"Why do I love SSBBWs? I don't know! Why do some people prefer blondes and some people prefer red heads? Why do we find sunsets beautiful? I just don't know. All I do know is that for all my life the sight of a VERY large woman, with wonderful blonde hair and beautiful eyes has always melted my heart. I gave up trying to explain it long ago..." ~ Jerry [FA]



ACCEPTANCE

Self Acceptance and Society/Fat Acceptance

Self acceptance is loving and appreciating yourself even if there are things you'd eventually like to change. Fat acceptance or society acceptance is getting society as a whole to accept that we have the same rights as everyone else and to reduce prejudice within the community.
Got something you want to say about acceptance? Let us know at info@ssbbw-magazine.com.

Self-acceptance means unconditional appreciation and support for who you are now, including all the elements that you want to change.


Things you can do every day to boost your body image:


Three Key Lessons My Dad Taught Me Without Even Trying

I would safely say that for most of my father's adult life he has been cantankerous, moody and judgmental. His Archie Bunker-type of personality has provided my siblings and me with many years of humor and head-shaking. But even with all of that, he has by far been the one person in my life who has unwittingly taught me the most. Here are three key lessons my father taught me:

Lesson 1: The best advice.

One day when I was about 23, about three years into my marriage, I went to my father to complain about a husband who didn't know how to communicate and an essentially one-sided union. My father listened intently to my woes and instead of offering a shoulder to cry on and unwavering support, he simply offered up the most sage short piece of advice I had ever been given. He looked me in the eye and said, "Well, kid, nobody ever said it was going to be easy."

Those 11 poignant words have stuck with me my entire adult life. I did stick out the marriage for another five years, but I did try...and try...and try before calling it quits. No matter what life has handed me, I have always been confident that remembering those simple words of advice would steer me at the very least toward giving things my all before making a decision to proceed or halt.

Lesson 2: Stand up for yourself.

After having two children and a failed marriage, I was (and still am) obese. My father, thinking he was being helpful, would make what he thought were funny jokes or comments about my weight, my willpower or even what was on my plate. I starting to dread most any family function and at one gathering my father made another comment about my eating habits and I broke down.

I had to "get real" with my father about what his words were doing to me emotionally. I was in tears and angry that my father thought he was helping when he was actually damaging my self-esteem and feelings of worth with hurtful comments.

I said, "Dad, you need to stop. I don't want to hear one more word about my eating or being fat. I know that I am fat and if you don't love and accept me the way I am, as your daughter, then I just can't do this anymore. Either you stop with the comments or I will not come to visit again."

That was 15 years ago and my father has never spoken another hurtful comment about my weight since that day. He has simply supported, accepted and loved me for me. Sometimes you just have get angry enough and hurt enough to not take it anymore. Standing up for myself let my father know that I was being affected and he had the power to change it and he did.

Lesson 3: It's never too late to change.

My father was by no means perfect. His level of grumpiness was mastered in his 30s and 40s, thankfully to be outdone by his 50s, 60s and beyond. He has been happily married to the most wonderful woman for over 25 years now and still enjoys many things such as going to church, being with friends, walking, hunting and fishing. He recently, at the age of 75, was baptized in his church…this from a man who barely ever went to church when we were growing up. It's a lovely turnaround for a man who by all outward appearances could have sauntered into old age grumbling under his breath at the slightest provocation.

My dad has taught me that people can change. They can find love, peace, balance, enjoyment from life—and be their true selves at any age. Life is a continual journey and I am proud to have had my father be such a force of love and learning in my life.

Happy Father's Day to my Dad, and to you and yours.

"Life is a journey with problems to solve, lessons to learn, but most of all, experiences to enjoy."

Written by: T.E.Bush


"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body."
~Elizabeth Stone
"The greatest gift I ever had Came from God; I call him Dad!"
~Author Unknown

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