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THE FUNNY BONE

Tasteful jokes and comics


Know a good tasteful joke? Seen a funny cartoon/comic by or about SSBBW/BBW that made you laugh? Let us know at info@ssbbw-magazine.com.



Ten Indications of a New Year Hangover

  1. You get it into your head that chirping birds are the Devil's pets.
  2. Trying to gain control of the situation, you continue to tell your room to "Stay still."
  3. Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the same reaction as drinking a glass of fresh paint.
  4. The bathroom reminds you of the fairground cry, "Step right up and give it whirl!"
  5. You'd rather chew tacks than be exposed to sunlight.
  6. You set aside an entire afternoon to spend some quality time with your toilet.
  7. You replace the traditional praying on your knees with the more feasible praying in a fetal position.
  8. Your catch phrase is, "Never again."
  9. You could purchase a new fridge on the proceeds from recycling the bottles around your bed.
  10. Your new response to "Good morning," is "Be quiet!"

Dieting - New Year Resolutions

2007: I will get my weight down below 180 pounds.
2008: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200 pounds.
2009: I will develop a realistic attitude about my weight.
2010: I will work out 3 days a week.
2011: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.



"New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions."
~Mark Twain

"Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average… which means, you have met your New Year's resolution."
~Jay Leno

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