AN FAs VIEW
FAs (Fat Admirers) and their views, thoughts and issues
What is is like being an FA in today's society. What are the joys of living/being with an SSBBW. Are there drawbacks? Let us know at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Interviews with FAs
Each issue we try to introduce you to an FA. We know there are 1000's of good men in the world who are attracted to SSBBWs. We've seen some of them in previous issues. Right now though all the other FAs are being shy. If you are an FA and want our SSBBWs to know how beautiful and sexy they are, then please send us a message. Or perhaps you know of a wonderful FA with great views that the world should know about. Email us at email@example.com.
To see a list of previous profiles, click here.
Words from an FA...
People say they don't accept fat people because obesity us a health risk. I say, "Eat right, exercise- die anyway! Some people like to ski. Many skiers live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people like to climb mountains. Many mountain climbers live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people like to fly in airplanes. Many fliers live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people like to jump out of airplanes. Many parachute jumpers live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people like to drive cars. Many drivers live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people are urban pedestrians. Many urban pedestrians live long lives, but some die relatively young, yet we accept them. Some people are fat. Many fat people live long lives, but some die relatively young, but we do not accept them. What is that about? Does that not strike you as being profoundly unfair?
After all my reading- I'm less convinced that one's ostensible fatness is the actual direct cause of disease or death. Rather it seems that what one eats in the present (rather than what one ate in the past) is more of a culprit. If eating too many transfats causes strokes, heart attacks and obesity- then it does not follow that obesity causes strokes and heart attacks- eating transfats does. So one can increase the ratio of one's omega 3 to omega 6 intake ("good" fats to "bad" fats) and still remaining fat, decrease risk for strokes and heart attacks. Just because being fat is associated with certain diseases or conditions it does not necessarily imply that being fat causes them.
But even if one really likes being fat, loves eating fattening foods and enjoys the look and feel of their nice, soft, fat body- even if this increases risk of stroke, heart disease or early death- why should fat people not be accepted? So what?! In other parts of the world, fat people are not only accepted- their fatness is honored and respected. It's the US in -particular- and maybe Canada and the UK that have this thing about putting down fat people. This really makes me angry. Actually I feel profound sorrow at such outrageous injustice.
Fat women are so incredibly sensual and sensuous. Many with whom I have spoken acknowledge that they feel much more sensual after becoming fat than they did before they got fat. They have told me how much they feel more intensely luxurious bodily sensations that they never felt when they were skinny because skinny people simply don't have any flesh where those erogenous zones are! When I massage the soft luxurious body of a fat woman, and lick and suck her fat- I can turn her on in ways skinny women can only dream about, and that heightens my erotic pleasure!
I think the real culprit is the fashion and diet industry. Both make billions of dollars exploiting the so-called virtues of skinny women. And they don't care what the emotional impact -or collateral damage- of their obscene approach to advertising is. For some, when it comes to making money- the impact of their actions on people's lives is irrelevant. As Don Corleon said in the Godfather, "I'm sorry he had to die. It was nothing personal- it's just business!"
My mom is going on 79. At 200 pounds, she is fat. She finds that many skinny people her age -or younger- break bones when they fall. My mom doesn't break bones if she falls because she has plenty of padding to cushion her fall. Fat people may have less risk of osteoporosis- a disease that embrittles bones in elderly women. Has any one in the medical research profession studied whether or not -along with taking supplements of calcium, magnesium and vitamin D- being fat reduces the risk of osteoporosis? Thankfully, my mom has already outlived her normal life expectancy and still seems to be going strong. She knows a guy who's 105. He weighs over 200 pounds and used to be a lot fatter than that. When he dies- are they going to say obesity was the cause? Nonsense!
People of all shapes and sizes deserve equal respect- period. There is nothing further to discuss. As Tom Lehrer once remarked in talking about National Brotherhood week, "there are some people who hate their fellow man- and I hate people like that!" We laugh at that- and yet there is cutting truth behind those words.
We stigmatize the mentally ill this way; we have stigmatized people of same gender preference; we have stigmatized people of color- less so then we used to but still a lot. In the 1940's we incarcerated ethnic Japanese in prisons and concentration camps for the sole crime of being ethnically Japanese. This was even true of ethnic Japanese who were born and raised in the US and never set foot in Japan. What we as a people have done to Gays, Lesbians, Blacks, Hispanics, First Nations people and many other discriminated ethnic groups and minority religious groups- not to mention so called "witches" in the seventeenth century- over the centuries is despicable. And most Democrats (so-called) now-adays are doing what they can to make life as difficult as possible for people who speak Spanish. Who cares that a large chunk of the US (including where I live in Colorado) used to be the country of Mexico about 150 years ago and that many Mexican nationals are forbidden to work in the land of their ancestors? We English speakers conquered the "First Nations" people who used to live here and imposed our culture, language and values upon them. So what did we do to the "Indians?" We massacred them- stole their lands banished them to live on wastelands; we made and broke treaties with them and we tortured their children if they spoke their native language in school. Immigrants and ethnic minorities have always been reviled in this country even though this country was built on the shoulders of immigrants, ethnic minorities and the indigenous people of this land whom the Spanish, French, Dutch and English suppressed when they conquered this land!
So, reviling and disrespecting all sorts of groups of people- including fat people- has a long and weighty tradition in this country- even if not particularly uplifting. The group upon whom our society decides to target its spite may shift from generation to generation. but it seems we cannot restrain ourselves from hating one group of people or another. These days it's smokers and fat people. The smoking shift has only occurred recently- but the power of the media to shape public opinion is profound indeed- and fat people and fat admirers often experience the brunt of it.
There are many people who give all sorts of reasons (excuses, rationalizations, etc.) why we should not accept fat people. They are no different from people over the years who provided rationalizations for not accepting Blacks as human beings, for being more civil toward First Nations people, for not accepting people with same gender preference, and so on. All of these people fall into the same category. They are called bigots. Bigots require patience and education.
In any event, in the last three or four years, I have come out of the closet to publicly declare my strong attraction to bountifully bodacious, fat women. Perhaps coming out of the closet as a fat admirer is similar to what it must feel like to proclaim that one is coming out of the closet as a lesbian or gay person because of such strong social stigma against same gender preference and being fat. Yet I find declaring myself to be a fat admirer is easier now than in the past largely because of the fat activism that has been going on for a number of years.
Thanks be to courageous souls like Heather Boyle and her friend and colleague in the fat acceptance movement, AnnMarie. In my mind, Heather is one fabulously fat, seductively sexy lady). She, AnnMarie and others are avid campaigners for fat acceptance.
And thanks be to you all at SSBBW Magazine! I very much appreciate the work you are doing for the benfit of all ssbbws and fat admirers.
Since I've been dating fat women, my awareness is much heightened about how devastating our society is toward fat people- not that I hadn't long realized this- but in the past, I hadn't really paid all that much attention to how contemporary society -primarily through manufacturing consent in the media- has mobilized mass revulsion against fat people. It is no different from all the other discriminations we have manufactured in the past- and no less reprehensible.
Now that I only date fat women, I became much more concerned and disheartened by the profound degree of social stigma that fat people -and fat admirers- experience. Indeed, like all discrimination, it is a form of violence, pure and simple. I deeply get how powerful this social stigma can be.
As my "fat education" has been unfolding, the obvious has finally dawned on me: (sometimes I can be a little slow)! I do not need to settle for a woman just because she is fat. Rather, I can find the woman of my dreams with respect to compatibility at many levels- spiritual, intellectual, emotional, cultural, values, hobbies, interests, food, sexuality, other enjoyments, and so on. and who is nice and soft and fat. Although with respect to whoever will become my lover and partner for life, for me, even if it is necessary that she is fat- it is not sufficient. I do hope my lover and potential partner fully accepts her size along with my ardent appreciation of her soft, lovely, fat body.
Recognizing the access difficulties our society poses for people who are blind, deaf, wheelchair bound, and so on- as well as people who are fat- I am committed to advocating for everyone's right to suitable access. FOr example, as a fat admirer, if I am taking a nice ssbbw out on a date- it is my responsibiity to call ahead to make sure the establishment offers comfortable seating accomodations for people of her size, for example. It is my job to check out the lay of the land with respect to stairs, elevators, and so on. In short, as much as we fat admirers are turned on the sensual pleasure of fat women, we also have a significant responsibility to our delightful friends to be ambassadors who smooth out the bumps in our treacherous, fat-unfriendly society.
Above all, it is our job to listen -attentively and compassionately- to our fat friends- without criticism or judgment- so that we fully understand and appreciate what our friends are up against. It is also our responsibility to come out of the closet and make public how much we appreciate the gifts, talents, brains, and compassion ssbbws have to offer.
If my ssbbw lover decides to lose weight some years hence. well. I just hope she doesn't decide to lose a lot! If surgery is at issue- I am aware of significant drawbacks that accompany a number of procedures designed to remove or reduce fat- and I would certainly encourage anyone considering such a course of action to explore a full range of opinions and perspectives before uncritically taking such a step.
I have had some wonderful dates with ssssssbbbbws (salaciously, super-sized, soft, sensual, sexy big, beautiful,bountifully bodacious women)- and made some lovely fat friends in the last few years... I'm still looking for Ms Compatible, though. I recognize that not only do I desire to find a judiciously juicy, beautifully bodacious, pleasingly plump, vexatiously voluptuous, fabulously fat woman for friendship, companionship, and intimate play- but I really want to find a woman who wants to become my life partner. There are so many cherished values that I hold and things I do in life that I would love to share with that one special partner. Besides- it sure would be nice to have someone who is nice and soft and sensual to cuddle with at the end of the day!
Thank you for listening to my views regarding fat acceptance (which includes accepting SSBBWs and FAs as well as being open to considering the many ways our society has stigmatized and created obstacles for a vast range of people who have certain other attributes related to ethnicity, national origin, sensory perception challenges (blind, deaf, etc.), mobility challenges, gender preference and gender identification, language preference, socio-economic status, and so on.
In short, we all are human beings and we urgently need to get on with the business of accepting ourselves, forgiving ourselves and others for whatever injury we have caused or sustained and accepting everyone for who they really are- deep down inside- regardless of what attributes they happen to have!